Comments on: How do you deal with hubris?

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:58:52 +0000

Earl,

Thank you for your personal question and for presenting it in this manner and for providing the opportunity to participate in this discussion.
Life is a school and we’re continuously presented with learning situations.
To me, when things like this happen, the answer is always within. First of all, your self worth does not depend on what other people think of you and you do not depend upon the opinions of other people. If it does and you don’t like this, then this could be a belief you want to consciously and conscientiously work on to change.
Over the years when counseling/mentoring people, I often heard that they did not like it one bit, that at the end in communications like these, it apparently all ‘returned’ to them – and the other person could “do what they want to”. Fortunately, I have to say, it does. People do what they do – they live their own life. No one knows what their life is about and what they need to experience, as we are at the same time dedicated to figuring out what our own life is about. Growth doesn’t occur when these learning moments would ‘turn itself away’ from us, in other words, if we continue to view these as ‘exterior’ circumstances happen to us.
Therefore, I would suggest to welcome these circumstances, embrace them, self-reflect and make the most out of the opportunity for learning and growth you have been given. Then, you can, in freedom decide to provide a reply to these communications, or not.
In addition, I can guarantee you that once you’ve changed your belief (your unique mind programming) about these situations, you won’t find them occurring any more in your life. When the learning is done – your station’s frequency changes and another ‘audience’ is being attracted.
Kind regards,
Johan
Posted by Johan Reinhoudt

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:58:23 +0000

Be the wise when the others play crazy,
Posted by mohamed amroussi

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:57:53 +0000

Dr. Smith and all:

Dealing with negative people, or insults:

1. Calm down, they just had a bad day
2. Say something like, “Yes, that is an interesting point. But I believe that doing
….. will probably alleviate any issues, because ……”

When someone purposely insult you, or get your mad, you need to stay coooooooool. I learn from my mentor Li, when I was 7 years old, in Taiwan. Li said, “Let the other guy win, and walk away”.

When I came to USA in 1970, my Jewish professor Dr. H told me the same thing. He said, “Never say you are wrong. Just say, you have a good point, but I disagree with you”. I said, “What if the guy is totally wrong?” The answer, “With due respect, I strongly disagree with you”, The Jewish way is the best way to negotiate. I followed this, and I benefited for 40 years.
Posted by Donald Hsu

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:57:28 +0000

Hi Dr Smith
First of all thanks for being so honest about your own feelings in this and I think you have generated some great insights from others in this post.

The question for me is why you have focussed on this comment and why it has caused you pain. In general painful experiences that we dwell on are telling us more about ourselves than others. So my advice would be to reflect on why this anonymous comment has resonated with you.

My view on the other person’s behaviour is that this person reacted as you would a person who has self sabotaging behaviours. My view is that they havent singled you out. This is how they operate.They will react defensively to any advice that they see as a threat.

In my view there is not much point engaging with them so I would take the advice from others above about how to handle it in the moment.
Once again thanks for being so open
Warm Regards
Mel Cowan
Posted by Mel Cowan

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:57:03 +0000

Here is my suggestion:
Firstly give acknowledgement to hubris’ historical achievement that is what the hubris pound of. Secondly show the rooms that hubris has to improve. The first step is to give the hubris a ground to stand and the second step is to modify the hubris into a humble person. Just like pointing the location of the hubris in a map.
This suggestion would work in the situation when there are too many low ability people surrounding the hubris that the hubris has an illusion of the best of all.
Posted by Sophia YEUNG

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:56:35 +0000

Ditto… Barbara
Posted by Frank Gustafson

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:56:05 +0000

J, I didn’t wish to offend you or compare disciplines. I’m sorry you found my comment polarizing, but I can’t find where I attacked the humanities and the arts. I still think it’s clear that they each have their place.
Your idea of shutting down BP would be a reckless emotional act, but would solve nothing It’s a poorly thought out idea and as such was easy fodder for humor.
I hold no emotion for BP and don’t see hubris or any other emotion in a corporation as these are traits of individuals.
I hate that the leak has happened. Perhaps we will learn that we need to drill on shore, and in shallow water where problems like this can be handled in hours instead of months, but it’s equally likely that emotion will prevail.
Again if I offended you I apologize. I never intended nor stated that one discipline was “greater” than another. However, it is obvious that engineering is greater than any other discipline when there is an engineering problem.
Posted by David Baggett

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:55:39 +0000

Dan, thank you!!! Your recommendation is very helpful and to the point!
Posted by J McCart, MFA/MA

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:55:11 +0000

To focus this “discussion” on Dr. Smith’s question: “What strategies have you found effective in dealing with them? What do you do when you encounter hubris?” I would suggest reading Jim Collins “How the Mighty Fall”. He makes some great points about hubris. Companies who are successful consider themselves lucky, and consequently double their efforts to ensure success. Companies that are full of themselves expect to be successful and sometimes set themselves up to fail. I would try to point out examples, such as Circuit City and a recommend “How the Might Fall and Why Some Companies Never Give In”.
Posted by Dan Samson

By: Dr. Earl R. Smith II

Dr. Earl R. Smith II — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 13:54:44 +0000

David — thanks for your comment. I understand your perspective; however, the comparison of one discipline over the other is neither the question nor the discussion introduced by Dr. Smith. Mr. Bryant made an unprofessional attack response aimed at not only my contribution to the discussion, but also at my profession. However, he later re-entered the discussion with an informed contribution within his profession as an engineer.

Your input added to the polarization of professional disciplines. Engineering was not attacked, so why the attack on the humanities and the arts? Is there sensitivity around BP’s debacle in the Gulf?

The humanities and the arts embrace the environment as an essential and sustaining breath within our shared anima mundi. Therefore, we perceive and understand at different depth perspectives than engineers, neither perception being greater than the other.

Do you think engineers should have the preventative plan their discipline purports to have, as well as provide solutions to remedy unforeseen accidents? Thus far in BP’s massacre of the Gulf, engineers failed in preventative measures, as well as solutional approaches. I surely acquiesce to the “greatness” of engineering if a solution were forthcoming, yet months have passed and no solution has emerged. Greatness cannot be awarded and hubris still surrounds BP.
Posted by J McCart, MFA/MA